Why I just canceled my Kickstarter program

ImageI spend a lot of time writing, and this is not a new thing for me, but is more like a life pattern. I am able to express myself better in writing than I am in spoken communication. There are fewer distractions in writing. Yet, for all of my love of writing, and my consistent plugging away at it, my writing is not perfect. I am like many other people in that I am unable to see the flaws in my own work as easily as I can see the flaws in the work of others.

The time when I am most easily able to detect flaws in my own writing is when I am reading it aloud. I realized that when I was in Writing Workshop at school, and I had a student tutor point out a missing word in a sentence in one of the papers I had due for my finals. It is easy to make typographical errors, but it is hard to notice them when you’ve envisioned a complete sentence in your mind. You still see what you were thinking of when you created it. That is my issue.

The nature of the Kickstarter program was as follows:

I intended to secure the funding for better editing for my sImageequel to Solitude, which will be called Solitude:Disillusionment, by offering rewards that would be essentially equal to or slightly better than the price of the book if it were purchased outright. In other words, the rewards were approximately the same as a paperback, or hardcover, plus domestic shipping and handling. That’s not the same as advance purchasing, but advance purchasing does work similarly.

I would have then used the money from these essentially advance purchase like commitments from readers. That way I could make sure I was going to get enough money to pay for proofreading human beings and software, to ensure a better edited product.

But after two weeks, not a single person committed a single dollar to this project.

I take that as a sign.

It is a sign that I should let go of the idea that it is important to have better editing at this stage in my career than I have access to. There are many things I do not have access to, but I am a very determined person. I am a very poor, determined person who lives in a studio apartment with a fiance and two cats in a not so great neighborhood in one of the most dangerous cities in the USA, Oakland, California. You can Google that, but on that list it is number 13. This is who I am, and this is what I am working with: poverty, disability, and a low woman on the totem pole position in a number of different types of privilege. I can not afford for my shit to be perfect, and I just have to keep on trudging along.

So that is the plan, then. Not to give up.

This doesn’t mean there won’t be a Solitude: Disillusionment. It just means that the editing and proofreading are going to be done by friends, volunteers, and when I sell enough books $1 a page proofreaders that make their services available to independent writers like me. I am going to just have to accept it. This is how it is.

I can’t even afford an oil change for my 20 year old car.

I’m doing the best that I can.

 

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~ by Sumiko Saulson on May 29, 2013.

One Response to “Why I just canceled my Kickstarter program”

  1. You now have put the Oogey Boogie song in my head.
    What’re you gonna do?
    I’m gonna do the best I can.

    That’s a good answer, though. The best one ever.

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